This month’s Trucker Hat is one I received from Miss Stephanie Wilson of the Girl Scouts of West Central Florida. She and Jessica Muroff, CEO of GSWCF, invited me to speak to their girls a year back. The topic was Goal Setting and Achievement and I spoke to three different groups of GirlScouts and their team leaders during a weekend known as “Camp CEO.” Camp CEO is a transformative weekend in which CEOs and Business Leaders attend alongside the Girl Scouts and they share valuable experience. Not only does that happen all weekend long, relationships are created and bonds that will last a lifetime are born.

I was fortunate enough to be asked to play a part in the magic that was that weekend.  While my part only lasted about three or four hours or so, the impact on me has lasted over a year. What I probably never told Stephanie and Jessica was that they had given me a gift that weekend as well. The things I saw from those girls, the other speakers, the leaders, and the team members from GSWCF have stuck with me. I have hope for our future and the future of women in leadership now.

At the end of the weekend, Stephanie gave me a bag of goodies. AND I know it was special because she took time to know ME. All of us got gifts but not the same gifts. Each one was chosen specifically for each person.

When I opened my gift, there was a really cool shoulder bag in it AND…wait for it…a trucker hat! I was so touched that she thought enough of me to really find something she knew I would love and I do! This gift was icing on the cake but it meant so much more than “thank you.” It meant that Stephanie cared, put forth the effort to know what would make ME happy, and that it was something that time and thought was put into. THAT was the REAL gift.

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Some of you know that my wife, Lynn, is a General Contractor and that we own a construction company. This year has been one of her best and this Summer completely exploded. As luck would have it, my speaking business falls flat every Summer. Not sure why, but it does. This Summer I have been able to help her quite a bit, which is great because she needed it! Now, you aren’t likely to see me on a job site too too much. I typically work behind the scenes. BUT I am known to cut a nice paint line and I can supervise a clean up like no one’s business.

Here’s what’s so important about this hat. It represents the blood, sweat, and tears of my wife’s hard work. She built it from nothing and I am so very proud of her. She is good at it, she likes it, and people are nuts about working with her. Here’s the other thing. This is not my dream; it’s hers. BUT  this has helped so much more with MY dream than any of you could ever know. It has allowed me to continue pursuing my dream because it affords our family a living.

It took me a while to get that into my thick skull. I was SO into my own dream that I didn’t see what was right in front of me. AND I certainly didn’t appreciate it. This Summer, I realized just how important this hat is and what it means to me.

So, here’s the lesson for you. Sometimes, the things that are most important are not in your main vision. Sometimes, we don’t even want to see them because we are too in our own things and our own heads. I’ll remind you to stop and look at what you have and what it gives you. And then, be grateful for it. I know I am.

When you change your mindset, you change your life.

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Last Saturday I ran a mud run. No big deal you might think. Good for you. Here’s why it’s significant.

25 years ago or so, I weighed 231 pounds. That’s 231 pounds on my 5′ 4″ body. You do the math; that’s almost a half a pound per inch. I was round, uncomfortable, and really just unhealthy. I lost the weight and have kept it off mostly for the last 25 years. I learned to eat better, to exercise, and to take care of myself a little bit more.

Fast forward to 2019, I have found CrossFit, Paleo, and am generally a more healthy person all around. That said, I will likely never be an elite athlete. I don’t want to be. I live on this planet and I want to enjoy my time here. Sometimes, I eat too much, I drink too much, and I do things that would not be considered healthy. Everything in moderation, yes?

OK, yes, Lisa. But where’s the magic?

Great question. A few months back I agreed to do a Mud Run with my people from Post 9/11 Veterans. I am on the board and part of our mission is to get out with veterans and do things together. I might be biased in saying this but it’s a great group of people and the mission is solid. So, back to a few months ago…you know how you agree to do something and it sounds good at the time? Then you get to the day of and you start thinking “what was I thinking?” That was me. Yes, I work out. Yes, I’m much healthier. Yes, these are my friends who I love. But run a 5k that starts at 9pm that includes obstacles and mud? What was I thinking?

I did try to get out of it but I conceded and I’m glad I did. I chose doing the run and let go of that obstacle (see what I did there?). Then I just decided I would do my best. AND that’s what I did. While I couldn’t do all the obstacles (I did all but three), I did do many that I thought I wouldn’t be able to do with help from my team. AND afterwards, muddy, tired, and hurting a bit, I could not have been more proud of my team and even more so, of me.

You know, I am always going to experience challenges in my life and I am always going to have some fear of not being able to do something new. But I will never stop challenging myself to do more than I think because the feeling of conquering yourself is one of the best feelings you can have.

My goal that night was not to be the best on the course. Instead, my goal was to be the best me on the course. and that is exactly what I did. That was the Small Magic. I just kept putting one foot in front of the other until I got to the finish line.

What’s next? I don’t know yet. I only know that there is something. AND I will conquer that too.

Here’s the kicker. I made it to that finish line but now the finish line has moved farther. I have to challenge myself a little more for the next time. And as I sit here with ice on my knees three days later, I look forward to whatever that next challenge is. That 231 pound me could NEVER have done something like this.

Now, I have. And I know that I am capable of so much more.

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This time the trucker hat is from the Semper Fi Project. The Semper Fi Project was started a little while back by my good friend and brother from another mother, Omar Fuentes. Omar and I met years ago at a membership club in Tampa called the Centre Club. We both had tattoos, we were both loud and gregarious, and we hit it off right away. We formed a fast friendship that has only gotten stronger. We did have a little time when we didn’t see each other as much but we still made sure to check in and keep an eye out via social media or text. Fast forward a couple years and Omar started posting a LOT on social again. I saw this new man who had a passion for serving his fellow veterans. On top of that, he seemed to have transformed himself as well. I was inspired. Omar had created the Semper Fi Project and began talking to and helping veterans all over the US. Additionally, he had looked at his life and changed the things he didn’t like about it. He started working out with a vengeance, making time for family and faith, and sharing his observations with anyone he could. I was hooked. I reached out or he did. It doesn’t matter who did really but we started talking more again. We collaborated on a few things and next thing I knew, I was working out harder than ever and more of a sense of purpose by following his discipline of consistency.

He may not realize the impact he had on me but it was deep. I will always be a fan of this man and the way he goes through life. AND I know I will always have a cheerleader in him and a lifelong supporter. This hat will forever remind me of Omar, his mission, and being a better human to not only others but also to myself.

Today, Omar is making another dream come true. His passion for serving others has manifested in his own company, Accelerated Benefit Solutions. Omar launched ABS to help families protect their most important assets; health, income, and their family’s financial future.

Omar continues to be an inspiration to me and someone with whom I will always think of as a brother, friend, and motivator.

And that is this week’s Trucker Hat Story.

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Great question. It goes in there for several reasons:

1. It got your attention, didn’t it? You were reading my bio, looking at my FB page all innocent and stuff and there it was. Made you stop a second, right? You were interested.
2. I want you to know me. People like to do business with people they know, like, and trust. You’ll definitely get to know me after hearing the stories of all the trucker hats. You might like me because of them and maybe, even trust me (the jury is still out for that last one).
3. I want you to get a sense of my personality. Some of these stories are sad, most are funny, and some are nice. You’ll get to know what I’m about a little more after reading these stories of all these hats over the next several months.

All of this to say, it DOES tie into my social media philosophy. I think the best use of Social Media is to use it as a relationship tool. It’s not really a sales tool, although sales will likely result from people getting to know you more. That’s the good news.

The other good news? You don’t have to have 30 plus trucker hats in order for you to do it.
Find whatever YOUR thing is and share that.

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Here are two things that came to mind when I started thinking about this blog post.

1) I have always had a hard time in the past admitting I was something because I never thought I was good enough. Now, after the fact, when there’s nothing at stake, I’ll announce it like no one’s business! But the during is the hard part. I can’t tell you how many times that has tripped me up or become some sort of made up obstacle that I put in my pwn way. When I was a professional touring musician, I never told people that was my main job. I always shied away from it. When I owned a marketing firm, I really didn’t tell people I was a marketing professional. I played the part though. And now, most recently, I don’t want to tell people that I’m a motivational speaker. But, it’s true. AND I’ll start saying it now, while I’m doing it, instead of waiting for years from now, when I’m no longer in the business. What’s the common denominator? Lack of belief in myself. AND that is just some bullshit. I’m good. I know it. I can and have motivated scores and scores of people. I even have proof; they have told me. My clients have thanked me. My friends and colleagues have sent me notes showing gratitude for my advice, direction, and support. What the hell else do I need? I need ME to believe it.

2) A friend, colleague, mentor, AND freaking amazing person made me rethink my own hesitation to call myself a motivational speaker. Elizabeth McCormick is a kick ass, bad ass, and UH-mazing speaker and human. Recently, I got to spend a day with her and she told it like it was. She declared, “I’m a motivational speaker.” And then unabashedly explained why she very enthusiastically took on that title. She say that she motivates and inspires people. True. I have seen her in action. She motivates and inspires me. Another thing she said was really brilliant and simple. She said that a lot people are looking for that, not all the other fancy things we call ourselves. So, why wouldn’t she claim it? Duh.

So, armed with this new insight and a belief in myself, I proudly claim the title of Motivational Speaker. What is it that you’re not claiming about yourself. Believe it. Say it out loud to yourself. It’s true. You just gotta get you on board; the rest of us already are.

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So, last week I ran a 5k with some friends. First, I want to be completely transparent here and let you know I jogged it (people were walking faster than I ran). Second, while I did not set any land speed records, I did take 30 seconds off my most recent PR. Oh, and a bunch of kids and several 80-year-old plus runners totally left me in the dust. Whatevs. I did it. I ran (jogged) all the way, and I took some time off my split.

I bet you’re thinking “Great lesson, Lisa!” You pushed through, you persevered, and you finished….and then you remember the part about the Anti- Chafe cream.

I have “muscley” legs. Always have. I remember when I was much younger that my swim coach told my Mom that I had legs like an ox. I wasn’t ever quite sure how to take that but I think it meant I had a good kick. At least that’s what I’m going with.
AND since said legs are so “muscley,” they tend to rub together when I run. And long (for me the 5k IS long) distances tend to leave me with a bit if a chafing situation. And I don’t like it.

Once I decided I was going to keep doing this running thing (there is always beer or some kind of carb I won’t usually eat waiting after the end of each race so why wouldn’t I?), I thought I would have to address the chafing situation. That’s where I discovered For HER Anti-Chafe & Moisturizing Balm. It is my new best friend and I have pretty much been using it for every race or long run for the last two years.

Again, you’re probably saying to yourself “thanks for the tip, Lisa! We appreciate you!” But then you remember the lesson and now, you’re wondering again.

So here’s the deal. I like to put this stuff on very shortly before I’m to run. Most of the time, I have it in a little bag and I carry my phone, cream, and keys with me. Once we get closer to start time, I apply. It does not look pretty to reach down between your legs and take out what looks like a deodorant roller and rub it all over the inside of your thighs. It is NOT sexy. BUT it does work. Usually, I’ll hide behind someone, a tree, a car, whet have you and put it on. That one time I didn’t have any place to duck into; I didn’t put it on. I was in pain for a couple days. Why didn’t I put it on? Because I didn’t want to look bad or awkward or be the lady with the big legs.

You feeling me?

It was all about looking good or even better, not looking bad. That race taught me a lesson.

This past weekend, as we were getting closer to start time, I just reached down in the crowd of about 1500 or so and liberally applied my anti-chafe cream. I did not give a damn about looking bad, good, whatever. I wanted to do what was best for me and that was to put on the dang cream. And that is what I did and for 54 minutes and 25 seconds, I was totally comfortable because I stopped worrying about what other people think.

SO, to wrap this whole thing up and tie it in a nice ribbon for you, here’s the lesson.

Worrying about looking good usually doesn’t serve you. I can recall many times that I wanted to look cool and I didn’t do what I wanted or didn’t trust my gut. Every single time I have regretted it. Once, I learned that not worrying what others think of me is powerful and strong, I stopped having an issue with it. And I’m happier for it.

I’m not gonna lie and tell you I never worry anymore; I am certainly a work in progress. But I do get over it quicker and I do worry about others’ opinions less and less. And that is a SMALL step of progress.

OK, my next run is in July. Who wants in? I might even share my anti-chafe cream with you!

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I have a dog. Four of them to be exact. They all think they are people and that they should be treated like people. That includes what they eat. I also have a wife, Lynn. She IS a people.

One afternoon a few weeks ago, my wife and the dogs and I were sitting on the back patio having some lunch. It was a nice day, there was a cool breeze, we were talking, and the dogs were watching our every move with our lunches. At the time, Lynn was on this kick of eating Port Wine Cheese and crackers. Port Wine Cheese is the delicious, weirdly colored cheese that you scoop out of its plastic container and slather on a cracker. It’s really good; I have had it. That’s what she was eating that afternoon.

Towards the end of lunch, Lynn’s phone rang. Well, we were nearly done and I got p and put my dishes away and went back into my office. Lynn got up and went into her office.

Several hours later, Lynn is in the kitchen and sees the lid from the Port Wine Cheese container and asks me if I knew where the container was. I did not. That’s when it dawned on both of us. She left it out on the patio. We both run to the patio and what do we see? Not a container of cheese. We both looked at each other knowing exactly where to go next…the dog yard.

And there it was. A chewed up EMPTY plastic container that had just a few short hours before had been nearly full of the cheese. One of our dogs, likely the youngest one, had taken the container out to the dog yard and eaten ALL of the cheese.

Well, we watched her and all the rest of the dogs for that night to make sure there would be no adverse reactions to eating all that cheese, and thankfully, there wasn’t.

Funny story, Lisa. What’s it got to do with me?

That’s a fair question.

Here’s what it has to do with you. How many distractions are you challenged with weekly? Daily? Hourly? A lot, amiright? It’s so easy to get derailed by the doorbell ringing, the phone ringing, email, social media, kids, parents….you get it.

If we let those distractions control us, we become less effective, less efficient, less productive. All of these things stop us from being a better team member, leader, mom, friend, person.

Ok, I get that. I think we all get that, Lisa. Thanks for sharing the obvious. What do we do about it?

Also, a fair question.

I do a few things. The first thing I do is to make a list of all the things that need to get done. A Master list, if you will. It’s so much easier for me to focus when I don’t have a million things in my head taking up space. AND let’s face it, as I get older and take on more, I have been experiencing CRS. My dad calls this the “Can’t Remember Shit” disease. I make my master list, I put it on a BIG white board in my office, and it gets updated pretty often. As I finish things, they come off and new ones come on. Every couple days, I create my action items for the following two days. This goes on a smaller white board but this time I attach a time on it. For instance, CrossFit- 9am, Prospecting 1:30pm, and so on. Not only does this let me know what I’m doing today but also when.

The second thing I do is to only work on one thing at a time. That way if I do get distracted, it’s a lot easier for me to get back to doing just that one thing. I am one of those people who does not like to see that I have any unread emails or unaddressed notifications of any time. If I see them, I have to look at them. Inevitably, that sets me off on a trip down the rabbit hole and I lose all awareness of time and space and pretty much and rendered useless. SO, I turn off my notifications, close out of my email, and shut off anything else that might ding, beep, or buzz. I will log back in after I’m done working or periodically, so I do stay on top of any pressing issues.

Something else that happens pretty frequently, particularly if you work with other people around, is this. You are working on something pretty intently, you’re in a flow, and someone comes in or calls you and asks you to come do something, or to “look at this,” or “come help me with something.” Now, they ask politely enough and may of us get up or stop what we’re doing and focus on them. We have stopped what we’re doing and redirected our attention. Predictably, I will come back to what I was doing and not know where in the hell I was or what my thought process was. Here’s how I deal with that. When I am asked to move my attention elsewhere, I will respond with a “give me a sec so that I can finish this or find a goo stopping place.” I might also ask if this requires my attention now OR if I can get to them later. Both of these put me in control of my attention and allow me to stay on track.

The last thing I want to share with you today is taking breaks. Many times I realize that my distractions come from the simple need to take a break. I have been working on something all day, I have been in front of my computer for several hours, and I am exhausted by the task at hand. That’s when I find I am most susceptible to distractions and that tells me I need a break. Lately, I block myself for no more than an hour and a half on any one thing. After every block, I take a break. It could be a 30 minute block, a 45 minute block and on up to a 90 minute block. For me, that’s when I notice I am at the bottom of my interest, enthusiasm and productivity for any given project and I will be no good if I continue any longer. So I break. I go outside, I play with the dogs, I run, or whatever. Anything that gets me away from the task at hand and allows me to reset my brain for a bit.

There are certainly more strategies you can use here to help you manage distractions. I don’t want my post on managing distractions to actually become a distraction so I’ll leave you here. AND if you have some strategies that you use, share them here. We can all benefit from the community brain and your tactic might be perfect for someone else and me!

Right now, I’m gonna take a little break. I winder if we have any of that Port Wine Cheese in the fridge?

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Last week I delivered a commencement speech to the 2018 Graduating Class of Bell Creek Academy. As I was reading it for final review, I realized that this was NOT just for these graduates, but for everyone and I decided to share it here with you.

Welcome students, friends, family, and faculty. AND congratulations to the graduates of 2018!

When I was asked to do this speech, I was actually a little worried. I’m no one famous, I haven’t invented the cure for cancer, I haven’t broken any scholastic or athletic records and I’m still trying to make an impact on the world I live in. I’m not like any of those people.

And that’s when it hit me. I don’t need to be any of those. I’m different from all of them and that’s a good thing. Often, I think we try SO hard to be like everyone else and we forget who we really are. Being different is good, being different allows you to distinguish yourself from others, being different helps you stand out from the crowd and being different is where your gift lives.

That said, I do have four guiding principle that I live by and they have always served me well. They are KINDNESS, COMPARISON, RELATIONSHIP, and AUTHENTICITY.

I encourage you to look at your new journey and try these on to see if they might be a fit for you.

• KINDNESS- Always be kind. It’s so simple, yet really impactful. Today, it’s really easy to be self absorbed and only consider what’s in it for me. We don’t let people in line in traffic. We don’t hold doors open anymore. We don’t smile as say hello to people we meet daily. What if we did? How many times has a kind word changed your day completely? There have been plenty of times that someone has let me merge in traffic. My attitude after that is always thankfulness and probably a little relief. I’m thankful that someone was actually nice enough to let me in AND I’m relieved that the guy behind me will finally stop creeping up closer and closer to my rear bumper because he’s impatient. When the opposite happens and no one lets me in, I get more irritated, I might mumble some curse words under my breath or loudly and the guy behind me continues to creep closer and closer to my rear bumper which really just makes things even worse. How different of a day will I have now? So please, let if you see, let me in traffic. I have a maroon Durango. Remember- be kind.
• COMPARISON- Comparison can be an ugly and self-destructive thing. AND combine that with social media and it’s even more dangerous. Stop comparing yourself to other people. You will never be them and you shouldn’t want or try to. I started doing CrossFit about 2 years ago and I remember when I first got there, people were lifting WAY more weight than me, getting through their workouts faster than me, and it used to bother me a lot. I’d load up the bar an try SO hard but I couldn’t even budge it in some cases and I’d end up leaving the gym disappointed and feeling defeated. AND the workouts just weren’t effective because I wasn’t using good form or I was trying too hard to keep up. Finally, I realized that the only person I needed to be better than was me. These people had been doing CrossFit way longer than I had and it wasn’t an even comparison. It’s just like that with anything. Your experiences are always going to be different from every one else’s and to compare your self to them would be a disservice to both of you. Always strive to be better than you were yesterday, even if it’s just a little bit. Let that be the bar with which you use to measure your progress, not someone else.
• RELATIONSHIP & CONNECTION- these are two concepts that work together. Have you ever been to a restaurant and seen people sitting together at a table all looking at their phones? That’s not connection; that’s separation. Take that time to be with each other. It’s like sitting together, but alone. I’m half expecting someone to text someone else to pass the salt. Something else I see, too often we are in our own boxes, our own segments whether it be political, religious, beliefs, race, gender and so much more. The one thing we ALL are is human. Strive to be connected with ALL people. The only way we can make a difference is by embracing each other’s differences and creating authentic relationships. You want to be a change agent? Get to know all other people and see all perspectives. You don’t have to agree and it will expand the lens with which you view the world.
• AUTHENTICITY- Always be authentically you. You do not have to fit in anyone else’s mold. God made each and every one of us different for a reason. He knew that we could each bring something different to the planet. Celebrate your uniqueness and see it as your strength. When you try to be something you aren’t, it hurts you and eventually, you’ll be “discovered.” Your beauty and gifts come from your individuality and your mark on the world will be a product of your courage to be truly you.

Almost done…

Here’s my challenge to you. You’re really at the beginning of your journey. You have energy and vision and way more power than you think you do. Each and every one of you can and will make your mark on the world. What it looks like is up to you. Enjoy this milestone, your graduation day. It’s special and important and marks something extraordinary. BUT, don’t get too comfortable, because you all have an impact to make and we’ll be watching.

Sincere congratulations to you all!

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